Post by flossieskid on Sept 14, 2021 21:03:37 GMT -5
Of course, doctors were always taught to believe in science. When a mentally disturbed patient would display clearly “crazy” behavior or beliefs, they often ask their psychiatrist, “You believe me don’t you?” As I said, psychiatrists are suppose to respond in a non-judgmental way by saying, “I believe you believe that.” That reply is important so the patient feels “heard” and also feels like the doctor is not judging their behavior and the patient can continue the dialog with whatever is on their mind.
My husband has always been very accepting of my unique perspective on the possibilities of “light connections”. What is it they say, “Love is blind?” He just tells me, in a joking manner, “Just please don’t tell anyone you’re married to a psychiatrist when you share these experiences!” Of course, I do not follow his request as you can tell from my sharing these stories on the Forum! When the latest light occurrence happened and I asked him how he would explain it, after the new light was installed, he just smiled and shook his head. That is the most I can get out of him now! Non-committal amusement!
I know a little more about mental illness, than most wives of psychiatrists. I met my husband when I was hired as a receptionist/switchboard operator by L.A. County when I was 18. He was a staff psychiatrist and I knew him for 3 years before we went out on a date. Although, I thought it odd that I was the first one any patient would talk to when they came in the clinic. I wasn’t trained in anything and it was very challenging when a man came in with a knife in his trousers and another one entered with a gun in his waistband. I was exposed to a lot of different types of mental illness and I learned a lot!
I always think it is a shame that there is not more discussion or portrayals of mental illness on TV. I often thought Olivia held together very well for someone living with her in-laws and 7 kids! Of course, Valium wasn’t invented yet!! But, even if it was, I doubt any of the Waltons would have taken it. Rather, I think they would have the “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” philosophy.
I just wish people would stop thinking if they see a therapist or take necessary mental health medication they are “crazy”! Young adults have to take classes and pass a written and physical driving test to get their licenses. I think one year of therapy offered by schools in your junior or senior year (or maybe even as early as freshman year) would be so incredibly helpful to everyone. It might even prevent bullying and gun violence. Well, a person can dream….
Any thoughts Forum if the Waltons might have talked to a therapist, taken any medication or any ideas about mandatory therapy in high school?
Post by patriciaanne on Sept 15, 2021 19:55:58 GMT -5
^^^Well I would most definitely be against mandatory therapy in high school. I am against "mandatory" ANYthing. Individual freedom is what I value more than anything else, and I firmly believe that parents (or guardians, as the case may be) should be the only people making decisions for school age children.
I think therapy has its place. I am not a big fan of medication. In a given month, if I have to take a handful of Advil, it's a lot. There are so many side effects to prescription drug meds, you have to be careful. And sadly, doctors don't tell you everything (speaking only from personal experience) so you really have to do your own research and weigh the risks.
That said...if I couldn't function without it, then I'd have to choose the lesser of two evils. But I would have to be pretty bad off to resort to meds (of any kind, for any reason). I'm very lucky in that area. So far any minor mental health issue has been resolved with a few hours of crocheting in front of Netflix or a ride on my horse or a nap with my pups. Or a good prayer session. ☺️ I realize that's not the case for everyone, though. So for people who really need it to function, it's good that they have some recourse.
I don't think the Waltons would have sought therapy. But frankly, support systems were so much better then that I wonder if there wasn't less mental illness. Family structures were very strong, as you pointed out, even extended family often lived together under the same roof. People also had strong ties to the community and neighbors thought nothing of helping one another. In addition, more people belonged to places of worship and were members of a congregation. Belief in a higher power was much stronger than it is today.
I think that much of that has changed in today's society -- to our detriment. Not to mention the obsessive use of electronic devices and this work 24/7 mentality. (I have been guilty of the latter way too much myself.)
It's going to be very interesting to see if the pandemic will have a long range impact. While there are many, many negative effects that I worry about (especially for children), I see a trend of people working from home more, doing a better job of establishing work/life boundaries and hopefully spending more time with family. We can only hope!
Post by dewdroppatron on Sept 16, 2021 7:39:09 GMT -5
The social media connectedness and disconnectedness is the difference in adolescent mental health today I believe. Kids get on social media. It becomes yet another place where they can feel liked or unliked by their peers. When I was a teenager in the 80's, I probably spent most of my high school life with untreated depression. And yet I was on all the sports teams and to some in my school they probably thought of me as in the "in" crowd without any problems. As an "old" man now I have raised two kids into their early 20's and still have one teen at home. The depression and mental health issues you see today are way more serious. As a parent you could not just dismiss it like many of our parents did in the 80's, because today's kids are really harming and killing themselves, turning to prescription opiods, etc. And I really do believe the biggest triggers are their experiences on social media.
Anyway, my two cents about modern adolescent mental health. Not an expert, still just trying to get all my kids to full adulthood.
^ Indeed. The connection between mental health and cellphones is becoming more and more accepted. Multiple studies are showing that, because of the ubiquitousness of cellphones and the rise of social media dependency, we are raising a generation of the loneliest and most depressed children ever. It makes sense if you think about it.
One big problem is the almost total lack of real social interaction. Someone may have hundreds or even thousands of 'friends' (or followers or whatever they are called on the various formats), but nobody they can really confide in. They have far fewer real friends and spend a vast amount of their time sitting alone with their face buried in their cellphone.
Another big problem is online bullying. In real life, a child may encounter a handful of bullies in school and/or social circles. Online, the bullies can also number in the hundreds or even thousands, and the bullying is relentless. There is no escape because, with no social media, they have no social life at all.
It's a vicious circle and it's only going to get worse, not better.
"As long as there's one person on earth who remembers you, it isn't over." - Oscar Hammerstein
^^^ If I had kids, I'd keep them away from social media for as long as possible. And also keep them away from devices/screens in general.
I wish it was that easy. I have seen parents try that approach and their kids became so sneaky and rebellious later that they barely have a relationship with them now.
We try to delay it as long as possible, but when it is time we ease into it and try to explain that social media is something that lasts forever. Trying to give them their space, but also very concerned that they don't post things that they really wouldn't want people to read 5, 10, 20 years from now.
And also, likes on social media are not the measure of us as human beings. Yeah, it always feels good to get likes, even here on the Waltons forum, but it is not the end of the world if you don't have a lot of followers or likes.
^ I know what you mean about 'likes' and other such 'popularity' indications. Consider the stars under the user names here. I'm hoping they are gained by the number of posts, but I don't know for sure. I've been a member of another forum since 2003 and, when it first began, there was a feature similar to the stars but with red- or green-coloured lights under the names. They were gained by liking or disliking an individual's posts. The more you liked the posts, the longer the green light lines would become. The more you disliked posts, the longer the red light lines would become. That feature was discontinued within a year or two and was never reinstated.
Forums are not popularity contests although they sometimes become one. I don't think visual confirmation of it is a good thing.
"As long as there's one person on earth who remembers you, it isn't over." - Oscar Hammerstein
Post by patriciaanne on Sept 17, 2021 13:39:24 GMT -5
It comes down to kids feeling good about themselves, independent of what others think about them. And to achieve that, they need to struggle and accomplish things. Not a "trophy for every kid," because that's not REAL accomplishment. Kids also have to have a real sense of where they're going in life -- actual goals to help them achieve their dreams.
My only qualification for saying this is that I was once a kid with very big dreams. I lived in the city and wanted a farm for the horses, dogs, cats I also wanted. I knew that meant being serious about my education so I could have a well-paying career because the farm-fairy wasn't going to give it to me. I grew up in the 70s and all around me was drugs and alcohol. I was never tempted to get deeply involved with either because I knew that wasn't going to get me where I needed to go. And I didn't worry about being "cool" either. Funny thing is, as "uncool" I was, not indulging in drugs or drinking (too much!) and studying a lot, I still had plenty of friends and boyfriends. Because confidence is a big turn-on to others and I had that in spades. Letting kids work hard to achieve something they can be proud of (without jumping in and "fixing" things for them) is what makes them confident. And haters be damned.